Missing you...a little less....everytime you open your mouth.

Men, what not to say when a woman says she misses you: (via text)

Me:  How long are you gone for? I miss you [sad face].

Him: I'm back in five days.

Me: Ok. That's survivable I guess.

Him: Well, I would hope so!

Me:...you know, on second thought, take your time getting back here. Or don't come
      back [shrugs] see if I care...