New Year's Resolution List: Part 1

Getting started on my New Year's Resolutions List. These are in no particular order. Should I accomplish all these tasks in the coming year, and maintain most of these behaviors for the years to come, I should be off to a better a start and a better life in no time.

Let's start real simple.

This year, I resolve to:

1) No longer pretend to see the good in people. If you're a sh*tty person, you're a sh*tty person. I won't lie to myself and try to see the good where no good lies. This is an exhausting practice that's gone unrewarded [if not only punished] long enough. 

This Dance Again

So you're home once more for the holidays. Perhaps I'll be invited to attend. To sit by your side, not just as a friend. 

Maybe if we cross under a bundle of mistletoe, perhaps I could lay that one menacing wonder finally to rest.

Since you're home for the holidays.


But, more likely, as always, I will be peeking through the frosted glass window into your happy life. I will shiver from the chilled winds of rejection. Knowing all to well that I may not be the best fit, I am certainly a better match than your normal selection of beauty and niceties.

So once more, we do this dance, though I sway on the outskirts of your stage, I continue to wait patiently should your hand ever extend my way.

No Words.

I told him the truth about why I react how I react when I see him. I don't think he liked my answer very much. Probably because it involves a guy who's definitely not him. A guy who definitely didn't spend as much


time,



nor invested as much  $$ in nights out. Anyway, he was really upset with me when I told him the truth. The truth I knew he wouldn't favor, but I couldn't keep from him any longer. After all, he was asking. Can't say it was his right to know that I had moved on, but he had asked, and I couldn't flat out lie.

So when he wrote that I had no integrity, all I could do is gape at the screen in awe and confusion.


After telling the truth, I took the brunt of his anger and frustration head on, his words stampeding through my mind. An angry barrage of chaotic words and accusations. An attack on my value as a human being. I had given him the truth knowing full well this would be my reward.  As I shifted through his angry words, all I could only whisper my confused response:



                      I don't think he knows what the word integrity means. . .

What Constitutes "Adult Behavior" Exactly?

Things fell through with an older fella I was wasting time with earlier this year. Below is one of the highlights of the text-off.  This is what I get for telling the truth, regardless of the consequences...

Text: "I thought you were a mature woman. Turns out your just a casual little girl..."

[Pause] [Cringe] [Then forgive the misuse of "your"]

[React]: "Didn't you send me a dick pic?!"




In his defense, said dick pic was as R rated as one could get with this kind of shot, but still. Keep it in your pants and off digital media, sir.

Revenge Plot

Never get mad nor even.

                                                   Get better and be fabulous.


Cheers.

Tell me you love me

When you're sober, you're referring to all of me-the good, the bad, the ugly, the very ugly, the crazy, the good-kind-of-crazy- and when you mean it.


Jack@ss.

How I feel most nights out....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Truth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or they don't match my outfit.

Friend Zoned.

Due to recent events, I feel it is very important I put my feelings about what it means to be "friend zoned" (by me) down in black and white and published all over.

If I like you, care about you, want good things for you, want to see you happy, pray for you, and generally enjoy your company, then let me let you in on a little secret: we are friends.


If I am hoping I am out before dawn, I never learn your middle name (you have a middle name?!), and that I don't stumble into your roommate during my escape only to find out he's "the hot one," etc.. News flash: we're not friends, and you serve only one purpose.


I don't mix the two "zones". I don't like mixing the two zones. If you mix the two zones, I drop out the middle part of that latter zone description and that "one purpose" pumps up to several purposes and before you know I'm imagining what future offspring may look like and if I'd want to take on your last name or hyphenate (Hyphenate.)

So yea, cut the sh*t and know your role.

Cheers.

[Grand]Mother Knows Best

I recently took up cooking. I know, at this age it's not really a hobby and more of a "yea, duh, you're an adult now; and this is a basic survival skill," but, honestly, I think the ability to get dinner out of an unsuspecting suitor and seamlessly slip away into the night before he has a clue but he definitely has the check is a pretty necessary skill to have, but I digress.

Like any novice cook, I have a ton of questions [for example, I called my mom from the grocery store because I didn't know what scallions are]. One of those questions really stems from an observation:

You ever notice how your mother will suggest one way to prepare a meal [, a career, a life, a man, a family, and the list goes on] and your grandmother will suggest a completely different way of preparing the same meal [, career, life, man, family, etc.]?

So whose wisdom do you heed? Who got it right and who got it...mmmm, not so right?
Funny how women will spend a lifetime nurturing a child only to have her grow up to declare, ever so boldly, "f*ck pot roast, we're doing Tof-erkey for dinner!" and other variations of rebellion [in career choices, life choices, "man? pffft, who needs one?!", etc.]

It's always interesting to find out who knows best. Who knows, right?